12am: *Phone Buzz* Fraternity Boy- “Hey”

12:05am: Me- “Hi?”

12:06am: *Buzz* Boy- “Wanna Netflix and Chill?”

Every girl knows what this means and that it does not, in fact, mean that a boy is wanting to share his Netflix subscription with you with pure intentions of hanging out. Ideally he would allow you to pick out a movie in which there will be popcorn and “chilling.” Realistically there is a possibility that there might actually be popcorn, however there is an unspoken agreement that more will happen in this time period that might lead to further lifelong consequences including STD’s, pregnancy, abortion, and a complicated relationship.

But why do most relationships have to start this way? Is our hook-up culture so dominating that it takes over all other aspects of a healthy relationship? In college there is so much pressure to do what everyone else is doing and being left out can feel terrible. We want to go along with the hook-up trends because we are locked into a world where “hooking up” is what everyone else seems to be doing. Maybe some believe that if they go along with what the guy wants it may more likely lead to the relationship they are hoping for later on. Maybe, after the hookup, the guy will realize what a great girl she is and want to take her out on a date and then get married. WAIT! Isn’t that order mixed up though, and a little unrealistic? Shouldn’t the guy ask a girl out on a date before they get married and even before they hookup?

Reader: “But isn’t him asking me over to watch Netflix the same thing as a date? He DID ask me after all.”

My answer to that is NO. “Netflix and chill” is not the same thing because of the expectations it involves. It puts pressure on the other to behave a certain way than they otherwise would in a public atmosphere. Dating in college should be a time to get to know another person in a far more personal way than a hookup.